It is full of potholes and every day I seem to step into one.
It's a place for happy couples. For smiling selfies and outpouring of affection and expressions of love.
It's where happy couples go to extoll the virtues of their happy marriage. It's full of comments like "still going strong after all these years" and "so lucky to have found and married the love of my life" and "I love you more every year".
I used to be one of those people that wrote things like that. I called out anniversaries and special memories. I posted selfies on date nights.
I don't do that anymore.
Any selfies I take that have my husband in them...must always also have the children in them.
I don't post on my anniversary or talk about the "love of my life".
But I fall in the potholes of others on a daily basis and each one is like a punch to the gut.
A reminder of what I no longer have. That I can no longer refer to us as a happy couple. That even though we are rebuilding and we have not given up on our relationship...it has been forever changed.
I had always wanted our story to be the kind of love story that people were awed over. The kind of love that reinforced the idea of soul mates.
Now...I just hope ours that one day we can call it a love story at all.
